I use pheromones as an example
I use pheromones as an example that evokes more extreme emotion, however human beings are always feeling something, and proximity to other human beings affects those feelings. When one person looks at another person they both feel something else. When they look at each other different feelings are evoked. When they move closer to one another, when they communicate with one another, if there's mutual attraction ... these all send different combinations of feelings through each person.
Whenever we interpret these feelings as nervousness for whatever reason, human beings tend to fall back onto comfortable behavioral patterns that may have helped them alleviate those feelings at one time, but now only block their ability to communicate those feelings and act honestly upon them in that moment with true pheromones. Learn more at http://alphaguys.weebly.com/blog/the-most-physically-dominant and http://www.tuncergulensoy.com/build-pheromone-comfort/
Holding space is simply allowing those feelings to arise and listening to them rather than running away from them by cycling through personal social avoidance mechanisms -- or as I call them, "ruts."
Mateo's ruts may have been a little deeper because of the shame he'd internalized over the stutter, but we all have them. I'll be detailing them, and how to overcome them, in the following chapters, but the most common ruts can be summarized as retreating into one's head and overanalyzing the situation or getting jittery and talking too much. In both of these cases, their eye contact gets erratic and they're clearly not present in the moment. All of these things combine to make women (or anyone you’re speaking with, for that matter) feel uncomfortable pheromone production. Learn more at http://www.getawipe.com/index.php/2016/06/22/learning-about-pheromones/
It’s no different than if you were building a home. You go to the first contractor’s office, and it happens to be his first week working at this particular firm. He’s a bit nervous -- unsure about how exactly the process works, anxious to prove himself at this new job, over-excited because you’re his first customer -- and it shows. You don’t know why he’s nervous, but you definitely feel uncomfortable. You may guess that he’s pondering his compensation package or perhaps trying to rip you off. Of course, he’s just anxious to please you, but you don’t know that -- all you know is that something doesn't feel right. Pheromones can boost your confidence around your co-workers.
Then you go to the second contractor’s office. He happens to have the same amount of experience as the other contractor, but has stayed at the same firm for his whole career. As a result, he’s comfortable in his environment and secure in his knowledge of the process. He is calm and attentive, listening to your needs and making expert recommendations. His confident attitude puts you at ease. You feel relaxed because he does. When he looks you in the eye and tells you that it’s all going to be taken care of, you believe him, and that’s who builds your house.