Let us Focus on Pheromones
Quick, name a few of your woman’s interests or habits that you hate! Okay, stop… there were too many.
Let’s focus on one – since we’re in this technological age and all, let’s use her addiction to social media as our example is how our pheromones react.
Imagine that your woman is just glued to her phone and social media accounts, and you feel she eschews hanging out with you in favor of her social media much of the time. There is inherently nothing wrong with this, because you yourself have your own hobbies that seem inane to women that you would prefer sometimes to hanging out with your woman for more pheromones.
But I digress – the issue is that social media has taken over your woman’s life and is starting to become an issue in your relationship with natural pheromones. Learn more at http://www.thecompanyofpeople.com/?p=432 and http://www.qrstuv.net/objective-pheromones/
I propose that the best way to handle criticizing or expressing disapproval over something that your woman really likes… is to focus on yourself.
Confused? Read on.
Instead of insulting her interests and hobbies, refer to how they make you feel un-appreciated, a secondary priority, and neglected. There is nothing inherently wrong with social media, but when they start to interfere with how you perceive your relationship unfolding, it becomes a justified problem and topic of conversation of how pheromones work.
When you focus directly on the interest or hobby, the conversation becomes about depriving her of something she likes. It’s a subtle but distinct difference in how she will react to you. But when you focus on your feelings and not the activity itself, you will force her to come to the conclusion that she must change her habits to accommodate your feelings to see you happier for more pheromones.
This has the interesting effect of making her want to comply with the original goal you had in mind because it’s an affirmative change for her rather than a deprivation.
These are mental gymnastics at their best, so just remember to focus on the consequences of the action rather than condemning the action itself.
And believe me, just as you have many issues with your woman, she will have just as many issues with you. She simply may not have communicated them to you for a number of reasons – she hasn’t articulated the issue to herself, she’s not very emotionally communicative, she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings, she’s not very confrontational – they still exist and cause varying degrees or resentment.
So occasionally, when you feel up to the task and strong enough for the ensuing consequences, you should push her to communicate them to you. It can be as simple as you asking how she felt about something you did, or asking if something is wrong.
We all know that women don’t communicate in such manners naturally or easily, so you will likely have to dig for what her true thoughts on a matter are. Doubly so for negative thoughts.
You have to create an atmosphere where she feels like her negative thoughts are being heard and not just dismissed or rationalized by you. To do this, you will have to ensure her that she should feel safe talking to you about them, that you aren’t going to have your feelings hurt or regret it immediately, that you won’t grow angry, and that you want to go through this process to improve pheromone communication and the relationship in general.